Corner of solitude

Bazza is the maintenance supervisor at work, in other words he is my boss. A lame assed boss who loves to inflict misery upon his workers. Yes folks if Bill and Ted was working for him in the same slave labour conditions as I am they would say to him “FAG!”

His favourite pastime is to cause horrific psychological injuries among his subordinates, us the maintenance personnel. One minute getting our hopes up by telling us we can have a week off, in particular next week. Then shooting them down again with a wry grin by telling us that not all of us can have the time off, and that he will choose the ones who will have to work next week. Unfortunately yours truly was one of the ones who have been chosen to stay and work next week. I am pissed off! So for having to make me go to work tomorrow and all next week you have become an inductee into the Corner of Solitude’s Fag of the week.

All week the only thing I hear about is cricket. So for this week’s Fag of the week I have three nominations. And they’re all cricket related.

The first nominee goes to the Indian cricket team and cricket board. They had the nerve to hold the game of cricket to ransom by threatening to boycott the rest of their Australian tour, just because Singh was found guilty of racism and wasn’t man enough to cough it on the chin by serving the three test match suspension.

The second nominee are the Australian cricket team. For the main reason of being a bunch of pissweak numnuts. Just because you’re called a monkey doesn’t mean you’re being racially discriminated against. Like I said in an earlier post this week, if you’re being sledged against you’ve got to give your tormentor their own back, instead of being spineless and taking it out off the field for something as trivial as being called a monkey. I also can’t stand how Ricky Ponting handled the situation, as the captain he’s a bigger “FAG” than Symonds, Bill and Ted would agree with me. And what the fuck was he doing last week making umpiring decisions during the test, you’re not a fucking Umpire dude so leave the decisions to the umpires.

The third nomination and the most deserving of this week’s Fag of the week title is the media. All I heard the past week was cricket fiasco this and cricket fiasco that, I say enough already. Stop trying to build up something that’s obviously not that big of a deal. It should have stopped when the ICC handed down the three test match suspension to Singh, and so what if they’re appealing the sentence? I say good on the Indians for sticking up for their mate. And stop trying to make out that the Australian team is the villain of the whole thing because of their take no prisoners playing style. They’re winning their games, it’s also not arrogance if they want to have a bit of fun with their celebration. So for the media’s insolence they are the Fags of the week.

Yes folks, this is my revolutionary suggestion to make the game of cricket much better. Because we don’t need “FAGS” as Bill and Ted would say refereeing this much beloved Ozzie summer sport.

Umpires ruin the game, take for example this week’s test match between Australia and India, the umpires made so many mistakes it turned the whole thing into a farce. I don’t even remember who the umpires were, such was my disgust of the umpires during the game.

The blundering umpiring escapades even overshadowed Symonds sookie saga. He acted like a sook because he was called a monkey by someone from a country where they munch curry. Being called a monkey isn’t racism, it’s called sledging. He should be a man and give his tormentors some of their own back.

Anyway I’m all for replacing umpires with computers. We should leave all the umpiring decisions to modern technology. It’s already incorporated into the game anyway, so why not? Think about it, there is the snickometer, the Video ref, Hawkeye, so on and so on. Anything to replace these sorry excuse for umpires, because they are this week’s Fags of the week.

Who would’ve thought that the Prime Minister of Australia could ever become the Corner of Solitude’s next Fag of the week? I did, actually he’s been a prime candidate ever since the day he became PM, alot of people would back me up on that last statement. Which is somewhat of an achievement since that was ten years ago, and was way before the Fag of the week concept was even started (I only started it two weeks ago in fact).

I’m very proud to be the fag of the week for Australia

What has the PM of Oz, Mr John Howard, done to deservedly win this week’s Fag of the week award, I hear you ask? The last ten years would be a good enough answer. But this week he has really upped the ante, by enraging thousands of Sydneysiders, your’s truely included.

Sydneysiders endured four days of traffic hell this week, as the Sydney Harbour Bridge and city streets were cleared to give US Vice-President Dick Cheney, whom Johm Howard invited for a little get together no doubt, a clear ride. Not only that, but tax payer funded NSW Police were forced to become Dick Cheney’s personal body gaurds. That’s right folks, some of our most important public servants was pulled out of essential duties, such as protecting the community, just so they can play guardsmen. All because little Mr Johnny Howard can suck up to some American.

Well Johnno, you know what Bill and Ted would say to you right about now? They’d say “FAG!”